Why I Just Crossed Continents in Order to Shelter in Place
Ever since I started my life in San Francisco in 2007, I swore that if anyone in my family became sick I would return back to South Australia. No question. But little did I know that it would take our global immunity to be compromised for me to put my life on hold to return to Adelaide with less than 36 hours to plan.
As I write this, I am holed up in a rental home in the McLaren Vale wine region on day five of self-isolation, and like all of us, I’m facing an uncertain future.
The decision to leave my friends, community and network in San Francisco was relatively simple. No matter how wonderful my immediate home was, or what the resources were available to me, I could never forgive myself if my family became ill and I was not there when I could have been. Our family business services the healthcare industry, which means that hospitals, aged care facilities and nursing homes are their daily lives. While business is secure, the working conditions they are navigating are not exactly low-risk. I needed to come back.
With simple necessities packed, a plane ticket booked, and dear friends notified, I slipped out of San Francisco on an eerily empty international flight to begin a new chapter.
My resolve was to safely get home and settle. My return, on the other side, has been an emotional paradox of relief, anxiety, hope and panic.
Here are some of the challenges, which are by no means unique to my situation: adapting to working from home in new time zones, with new sleeping arrangements, and the uncertainty of where to go from here.
But through the uncertainty, there continues to be incredible rays of light that I hope you can also find. Maybe together we can find a little reminder of the hope, beauty and love that we have around us.
I think that starts with remembering gratitude. Here are five things that, at this very moment, I am grateful for.
The World Wide Web
Zoom, Go-To Meeting, FaceTime, WhatsApp video, and social media channels are a goldmine for resources, updated information, news feeds. Discernment here is key, and an overload of any one form can take its toll, but these tools have brought our global community together in ways that we could not imagine even a decade ago. At any given moment you can connect with loved ones around the world and see the faces and hear the voices of those you love. And that’s comforting.
Online Classes
Teachers around the world have pivoted to offer their services online. From hospitality support services, to addiction outreach, to yoga, meditation and workout classes, they all help connect us. It was solace to sit on my much-loved yoga mat here in McLaren Vale and see the familiar faces of my San Francisco yoga community smiling back. Even though my morning meditation would have received a firm “F” grade (thanks Monkey Mind!), for 60 minutes twice a week, the world just seems a little less scary.
My Breath Practices
More than anything, my breath practice has been an anchor that has literally kept me calm amid anxiety overload and panic attacks. Over this past week I found myself practicing so many techniques I have been honing. Mindful breathing to calm my nerves as I sat waiting for United to confirm my flight, for example. The “box breathing” technique (or four-part breath) that moves the rush of energy from my adrenal response to the comforting solace that I had somewhere to self-isolate. And the soothing bee breath to calm my overanxious mind. Thank goodness I listened in class…
Family
For showing up in every way possible, the gratitude I have for my family’s lifeline is boundless. From leaping into action at the first hint of change, to organizing a safe place for me to land, to grocery shopping so that I had food to settle in with, and the relentless support of my mental health, I have never been so grateful to be part of a kind, compassionate and caring nuclear family. I didn’t realize how much I had missed them. Until now. While our meetings are over cups of tea between glass sliding doors, as we all endure the two weeks of regulated self-isolation, it will be unspeakably great when I can finally hug them.
This Community
This community of A Balanced Glass has given me a purpose and sense of solidarity when I certainly would have self-isolated. Like many of us, I retreat when under stress, but this community has required me to show up moment-by-moment, do my best to support us, and not turn away from the challenges we face. Without this ABG Community I am not sure where my mental health would be. So thank you all.
On a final note, no words or actions seem enough this week to ease the gut-wrenching situation we find ourselves in. The decimation of our industry and impacts on the livelihoods of our loved ones is reverberating around the world as we face an uncertain future.
As much as I yearn to have answers, all I can ask is to please stay connected and in community. We need each other now more than ever. Please do not isolate. Please know that we are here and if you can’t pick up the phone, please just send a text or send up a flag. We are on the lookout.
I hope knowing that you are in our hearts and minds helps. I look forward to having a hug in person soon.
Until then, be well.
Namaste,
Beck
What We're Reading:
There's no shortage of wine stories and media inundating our IN Boxes. Here's what has piqued our interest this week.
To Control Your Life, Control What You Pay Attention To, by Maura Thomas in Harvard Business Review
To be consistently productive and manage stress better, we must strengthen our skill in attention management.
How to Give Back to Hospitality Professionals Impacted by Covid-19, by VinePair.com staff
Hospitality workers have been the hardest hit by the current crisis. VinePair has dedicated their resources to reporting about the crisis.
That Discomfort You're Feeling is Grief, by Scott Berinato in Harvard Business Review
If we can name it, perhaps we can manage it. Here's a Q&A with a foremost expert on grief, about acknowledging the grief you may be feeling, how to manage it, and how he believes we will find meaning in it.
The Food and Wine Pro Guide to Mental Health and Sobriety, by Kat Kinsman for Food &WinePro.com
The coronavirus has left many hospitality workers in a fragile state; here Kat Kinsman offers a list of useful resources to help those who may need support with mental health and sobriety.
Meet the Community!
Our community is only as strong as the company we keep, and here we meet some of the folks who make our profession so dynamic.
Sorcha Holloway, Founder/Host #ukwinehour, Plymouth (UK)
Years In Industry:
In many ways, I am a relative newcomer to the wine industry. Despite starting off in wine tourism at the end of 2014, I think my wine journey really started properly in July 2015 when I launched the #ukwinehour Twitter chat. I was aware of a number of wine chats across the pond, which usually took place well after our European bedtimes. It seemed like a good idea to start one in this time zone so I created the hashtag and hosted the first chat a week later. After a couple of years I dropped the wine tourism to focus on #ukwinehour and the community continues to thrive and grow.
My Biggest Challenge To Wellness:
I can be my own worst enemy sometimes - I have always had very high expectations of myself but have a tendency to take on too much and often end up spinning too many plates. I should really have learned from this many years ago when I burnt out completely and was forced to give up my career as an Obstetrician/Gynaecologist. Subsequently diagnosed with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome/ME, I have been learning since then how to live my best life while seeking balance to avoid relapse.
Sometimes the responsibility for #ukwinehour can be quite overwhelming and I feel the need to continue to push through to deliver, even with bad migraine.
How I Keep It Together To Stay Well:
I do need sunshine and fresh air so usually try to have a winter sun break every year to get me through until spring. I am fortunate to live in a coastal city and can see the sea from my bedroom window; just being able to see the water, even at a distance, gives me the space I need to breathe. When I first moved from Ireland to England I lived in the beautiful Peak District. However, despite the outstanding natural beauty there, I felt stifled being so landlocked.
Nowadays, despite, or perhaps as a result of, the extra challenges over the last two years with family illness, bereavement and state of the world, I think I am finally getting there with a good recipe for my own health. I try to avoid to-do lists, and do have to be careful with social media, particularly since #ukwinehour is Twitter based. I feel more comfortable about allowing myself to have a week off now whereas I truly used to worry about letting people down!
Nevertheless, my three top tips for a wellness toolbox are Sleep, Meditation and Yoga:
Sleep is vitally important. I love to get up early when our home is quiet but can only do this if I go to bed early enough.
Meditation can be truly life changing. I discovered the power of meditation during a CFS relapse seven years ago. Calming the mind also calms the body - releasing tension releases energy that can be put to better use.
Yoga in combination with meditation brought me out of my relapse seven years ago, but I foolishly fell by the wayside in the meantime due to allowing life to get too busy and not making time for this vital practice. Thankfully, over this last year I have returned to regular asana practice and continue to feel physically stronger day by day. I try to balance hatha and flow classes with restorative and yin. Again, balance is key.
You can connect with Sorcha on Twitter @SorchaHolloway (where you can also join @ukwinehour most Thursdays at 19.00GMT/BST by searching for the hashtag #ukwinehour) and on Instagram @awaywithwine
