Day 9: When We Cling to “Certainty”
In modern society and an uncertain world, we tend to cling to safety. Our material possessions, homes, cars, our relationships with lovers, family, colleagues and friends, carefully curating our lives to be exactly as we want or think it should be.
But in yoga we learn impermanence; not to grasp, to stay present and open so we can experience the present moment with open eyes and ears. Easier said than done in our busy lives!
My latest challenge was a text exchange with a co-worker I that raised my ire. I found myself in that familiar endless cycle – I was sure I knew what his text REALLY meant. And what the next steps would be, and where to from here. And How I would respond.
I clung onto the words and created scenarios in my head based on what I was hearing and what I was certain that he would say. Before anything had unfolded, I had constructed a situation that gave me an outcome that was familiar. It would all be exactly what I needed. My mind whirled with confusion and questions, uncertainty and negativity as I played out scenarios of what might be. Without giving him any chance to have a say.
Then I got on my mat for meditation, and there I realized what I was creating was contrived, limiting and just plain false.
So with great might I dared to stop thinking. And it got REALLY quiet in my head. Like deathly quiet. I stepped away from the situation, even through the emotional pull to stay in the drama pulled me like iron filings to a magnet. I wrote the exchange down to force myself to see the reality of the situation, and reading it back realized I was attached to what I had created rather than listening and observing what was actually there.
So consider this: what in your life are you attaching to?
And is it real? Or a created situation with a response that hasn’t yet happened?
How would you feel if the scenario was left wide open to whatever response came?
Leave the empty space to be filled with consideration and presence, A quiet space, to be found in the inhale and exhale. From the imagined to the real. From the drama and confusion, to the clear and open.
Try it and see how your perspective can change. Mine sure did and the outcome was better than I could have hoped for.
PS The blog of this series is up over on my website, for your convenience and to revisit at your own pace. Enjoy!