Turn The Volume Down a Notch. Here's How.
The holiday season can be a very difficult time in the brightest of years. But here in 2020, a year defined by a global public health crisis, economic upheaval and uncertainty on every level can leave us feeling triggered, emotional, and plain exhausted.
Over the past months, I've noticed that a few particularly resonant situations have reared their taxing heads. What may have once been simple tasks seem more difficult. Maybe those who we once relied on are disappointing us with their actions, or inaction. Or the stress of not being with loved ones in a physical sense leaves us feeling alone, anxious and struggling with mental health stressors that wouldn't have even been a stressor even a year ago.
Yet with societal pressures to stay "busy," many of us continue to hold ourselves accountable to levels of activity that are no longer attainable. To fulfill roles as parents, caretakers, community leaders and, in the meantime, juggle a reality that is impossible to understand. It’s exhausting.
So this week the request is simple.
Go easier on ourselves and give ourself permission to do a little less. Tick a few fewer "boxes" and turn the volume down a notch.
How can we do that?
You've heard these suggestions before, no doubt. But here are a few hands-on applications that make sense to me personally.
Build small spaces of time to play and find joy. For me it's been solo bike rides and drives in a car I've named "Von."
Listen to your body for early signs of fatigue and take some time for self-care. For me it's been appointments on the meditation cushion as well as with Dr Yang, my beloved Chinese medicine practitioner.
Make time to tell someone how much you appreciate them. For me it's been reaching out to a list (yes, there is an actual list) of people I'm grateful for, and emailing or calling or Zooming them to tell them in no uncertain terms what they mean to me.
Offer an act of kindness. Last week Cathy asked me to send her some tea to help get her through the holiday season in a mindful, slowed-down kind of way. I sent her three different options that are meaningful to me, because I know she'd appreciate them all.
Let this be enough: Drop the expectations of ourselves and others and hold on to the faith that we are doing our best. We are all showing up as well as we can with what we have to offer in any given moment.
Also, try to find a little perfect imperfection in how things should be. We don’t need to hit a home-run every time you pitch. Yes, first base is enough. Not every home-cooked meal needs to look like the image, and not every conversation or interaction needs to be life-changing.
Sometimes the connection to others is all we really need.
And remember, again, to rest and turn the volume down a touch.
Namaste,
Beck
What We’re Reading:
Here's What Has Piqued Our Interest This Week In The World Of Wine And Mindfulness.
Am I Too Easy on My Kid? - The New York Times (possible paywall)
The pandemic makes enforcing rules so much harder.
We’re All Socially Awkward Now - The New York Times (possible paywall)
Deprive people of interactions with peers, and their social skills will atrophy. This is yet another side effect of the pandemic.
For Hard Conversations, Families Fall Into Four Categories – The Greater Good Science Center
Holidays can involve family conflict, especially after a divisive election. The solution is empathy, for yourself and others.
5 Potential Mental Health Benefits of Deleting Social Media – Self.com
Thinking of going on a social media cleanse? Here's what you need to know.
Making Time for Self-Care – Athena Davis for Harney Lane Winery & Vineyards
Athena Davis shares some short reminders for keeping self-care top of mind at this challenging time.
This Week’s Reminder:
Keep These Short Meditations And Inspirations Bookmarked For When You Need Them.
REPLAY - Parenting During the Pandemic: An ABG Webinar
If you missed our community webinar earlier this week , you can watch the audio or video (or both!) replay on the A Balanced Glass website here.
Meet the Community!
Here We Meet Some Of The Talented Folks Who Make Our Community And Profession So Dynamic.
Stefanie Schwartz, Head Sommelier, Portale Restaurant (New York, USA)
Years in industry:
Fifteen! My first restaurant job was as a hostess at an Uno Chicago Grill in Florida, senior year of high school. Since, I attended Johnson & Wales University in Charlotte, North Carolina learning about back-of-house operations and was introduced to the magic that is the world of beverages. I moved to New York City after graduation and have worked in so many amazing restaurants (Aureole, Le Coucou) as a sommelier, leading me to the current position of Head Sommelier at Portale Restaurant.
My biggest challenge to wellness:
Myself. I have high functioning anxiety with a side of depression. When one or the other becomes overwhelming, I go to extremes: go faster and do more, or stop all together. I notice this when there’s a pile of dishes in the sink (because who has the time?!), or when my body decides to forcefully slow down.
The latter happened recently. Running, work, rock climbing, yoga … my left hip flexor become strained and overworked. I could hardly walk for two weeks. With hot baths, massage, and physical therapy, I’m so close to being back to 100%. But there’s still some strain that is reminding me to slow down, rest, and to sit with myself. This experience has forced me to face emotional discomfort while physically healing. It’s important to do this because this is where we grow, even though it’s scary.
How I keep it together to stay well:
I have a check list on my bathroom mirror of daily rituals that keep me grounded. If I haven’t done all five things, then I need complete the rituals, and reassess daily feelings. These daily rituals are: practicing yoga, expressing gratitude, making the bed, washing dishes, walking outside. These rituals maintain cleanliness of the mind and home. When I skip one, like letting the dishes pile up, it’s a physical signal that something is off.
Having a strong support system also keeps me together. My closest friends are scattered from NYC to Florida to Pennsylvania to Oregon. But these people are there 100% for me in the best of their capacity, utilizing text messaging, phone calls, FaceTime, Zoom … any way we can connect emotionally.
A huge shift in my wellness came in June, when @sommation_live started on Instagram. This has become a lifeline. This group chat doesn’t seem to stop. We cover all topics and are very candid with each other. I’ve been introduced to so many beautiful souls that teach me so much. This group has become chosen family and I would feel lost without them. There aren’t words strong enough to express my gratitude for this community.
You can connect with Stefanie on Instagram @stefanieschwartz @sommation_live
Facebook and LinkedIn
Let’s Get Connected:
Sharing Events From Our Global ABG Community.
Thursday December 3rd, 10am - 2pm PST | 1pm - 5pm EST
Be The Change Virtual Job Fair
Be The Change is the firstwine industry virtual job fair focused on Diversity and Inclusion. Brazen’s cutting edge virtual platform extends the opportunity for job-seekers to connect and engage in real-time with employers looking to recruit and hire diverse talent.
Have an event that our ABG community would love? Email to events@abalancedglass.com for consideration.
